My wonderful red-head!
Real conversation I had with Dmitri, my seven year old:
D: Mom, can you believe how fast I'm growing into my maturiosity?
M: (stifling giggle) No, baby, I am so amazed at how big you're getting!
D: I'm even growing a mustache already!
M: (tugs peach fuzz) Ya think?
D: Yeah, and look at how big my peps are getting!
M: Peps?
D: Are they called peps or pips? Yoooou knooooow, my boobs, but they're not called that cuz I'm a boy...
M: (OK, you can do this...maintain...breathe...)Oh, ahem, yes, those are Pects, honey. And yes, you're getting stronger all the time! I'm so proud of you!
At this point Dmitri retreats back into his room where he dons his newest self-created costume...
You see, the men in my life went to see "Nacho Libre" the other night, and Dmitri was INSPIRED!! He is...(drumroll, please): Wild Tiger! (-iger, -iger, -iger...)
Try and picture, if you will: He has chosen blue as his signature color, and has done his level best to make a very wrestler-ish costume. He is wearing a bright royal blue tee, dark navy blue dress slacks and a pair of (stretched and mangled looking) light blue boxer briefs over said slacks. He is wearing a pair of green, red and yellow cowboy boots (that are too big, but he loves them more than any pair of shoes he has owned in his short life). They have been scuffed and since re-colored with green, red and yellow sharpies to look "as good as new". In lieu of a real wrestler's mask (and lacking even a ski-mask) he has tied his blue tiger-striped bandana over his whole face (probably the inspiration for the costume in the first place, come to think of it) -- and he stumbles around the house, half-blind by a close-up view of stripes and cotton fibers. Once in a while he will untie the lower part of his bandana and flip it over his crown, creating the illusion of a very unusually be-habited nun...a nun with a tiger striped cowl who wears her underwear over slacks while sporting brightly colored cowboy boots, that is...a nun who stands in front of the mirror, flexing her peps (pips...whatever) and muttering to herself about conquoring her opponent.
It's not entirely certain what sort of moves he would unleash on any unwitting foe as he's really not allowed to be rowdy in the house. But I am certain that he would reign victorious as King of all Wrestlers given a proper ring and the right to pummel other humans indiscriminately...
I love being a mother! Things like this make up for potty training without a doubt...
posted by Karis at 12:55 PM
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